Sword of Energy and Apathy
Action and Thing: You may play an extra Action this turn. Target opponent may not play Actions on their next turn.
If you start smiling (show your teeth!) at the beginning of your turn and keep the smile until you end your turn, bring this thing into play under your control at the end of your turn.
Thing: Destroy 1 thing of your choice.
Action: Choose a player. That player discards 1 card. Then look at that players hand and take one card of your choice.
"It's okay. I didn't want to sleep anyway!" -- Bub
Take all cards from all players hands, shuffle them and distribute them randomly to all players. Every player should get the same amount of cards. Put the leftover cards into the discard pile.
Becuz por literacy is kewl!
There must be at least 1 thing in play with at last one typo on it to play this.
Destroy all things in play, that don't contain at least 1 typo.
Action: Put a delay counter on this card. Any player may play this action.
When there are three delay counters on this card, destroy it.
Players can't search the deck.
Principia Discordia Blackout
Action: Give control of this card to target player.
When anything in the game is chosen randomly, you must discard a card. If you don't, you lose the game.
He Who Wields The Lost Sock
Thing - Elemental
Upon entering play, all tokens disappear(this ignores being destroyed) and all things gain two sock counters.
Action: Take one sock counter from another thing and put it on this card.
Action: If there are ten sock counters on this card, target player loses the game.
So that's where they went.
e.e.cummings' vengeful ghost
thing - poet ghost
if any thing in play has more than four capital letters in its flavor text, e.e.cummings' vengeful ghost is destroyed. all card texts and titles count as though they have no capital letters on them.
action: create a poem token.
if a poem token died this turn, create a poem token. this does not use up your action.
Thing - Server
If a Thing refering to censorship is in play, The Internet is blank(excluding this sentence).
Action: Put a File Counter on this card.
Take a File Counter off The Internet. Create a File Token that is a copy of a card of your choice, with "Action:
Destroy this card. put a File Counter on target Thing." on the end.
Mountain of Knowledge
At the beginning of your turn, before you draw a card, put a knowledge counter on Mountain of Knowledge.
During each player's draw step, that player draws an additional card for each knowledge counter on Mountain of Knowledge
Mountain of Energy
At the beginning of your turn, put an energy counter on Mountain of Energy.
Each player may play an additional Action during his or her turn for each energy counter on Mountain of Energy.
At the end of each player's turn, put X awkwardness counters on Awkward Silence, where X is 2 minus the number of Things and/or Actions that player played that turn. Then that player wins the game if the number of awkwardness counters on Awkward Silence is 10 or more.
I WILL KILL YOU WITH MY MIND
Target any number of different Things, one at a time. For each target, you may sacrifice X Energy tokens, where X is the number of targets chosen before this one. If you do, destroy that Thing. (For the first thing chosen, X = 0. For the second, X = 1, etc.)
Sword of Harmony and Discord
Action and Thing: Destroy target Thing. Gain control of it instead if it is a pony. Each player other than that Thing's previous controller draws a card. Each player who controls a pony draws a card.
Sword of Comedy and Tragedy
Action and Thing: Look at the top 7 cards of the deck, then choose a player and put one of them into that player's hand. That player discards a random card. Shuffle the deck.
Sword of Rise and Fall
Action and Thing: Draw a card. Target opponent discards a card.
Ice Ghost Mask
Action abilities of living Things your opponents control can't be activated.
All within its frosty gaze are rendered immobile.
Players can't search the draw pile or look at cards in it.
The draw pile can't be shuffled or reordered.
We are powerless to alter the future.
Action: Destroy half of target token.
She hasn't grown into her usefulness yet.
Target opponent destroys any number of their tokens, then you destroy any number of your tokens. If your number minus their number at least
0: They reveal their hand
2: You discard a card from it
6: Put that card in your hand
8: Play it
30: And eliminate them.
Plots That Span Centuries
Discard a card. If you do, and you have already played Plots That Span Centuries this game, you win.
Sword of Brawn and Brains
Action and Thing: Any opponent may destroy a Thing they control. Otherwise, you draw a card.
Sword of Grandeur and Insignificance
Action and Thing: Discard your hand and destroy all other Things you control. Look at the top 25 cards of the deck and put one of them into your hand.
Destroy one of your Things. For each word in its name (up to 10), gain a token of any type. If that Thing wasn't a Token, draw 2 cards.
Promulg in Sheep's Clothing
When you play this, you may change its name.
At the start of your turn, destroy a Thing with the same name as this one.
Driven insane by hunger, it devoured itself.
When Inverted Ankh enters play, draw a card.
As long as you have no cards in hand, you can't be eliminated.
Discard your hand, then look at the top ten cards of the draw pile. Put five of those cards into your hand, then shuffle the draw pile.
If you knew your future, would you want to keep it?
Highway to Hell
Whenever your hand becomes empty, put an Inferno counter on Highway to Hell.
At the beginning of your turn, you win the game if Highway to Hell has six or more Inferno counters on it.
Follow the Infernal Lords into madness, into depravity, and into eternal, blazing glory!
Sword of Nature and Industry
Action and Thing: Look at the top card of the deck. You may play it if it's a Thing. You may destroy target Thing. If you do, its controller draws two cards.
Sword of Existence and Oblivion
Action and Thing: Remove target Thing from the game. Its controller chooses another card that has been removed from the game and plays it.
Destroy target Thing. For every sword you control, destroy target non-sword Thing or target player discard a card. For every two swords you control, each opponent discards a random card. For every three swords you control, eliminate an opponent.
Each player who doesn't control a black Thing discards a card, then each player who controls a black Thing draws a card for each card discarded this way.
When someone plays a blue Thing, it becomes the same color as this Thing.
If an opponent controls 5 Things that have been recolored this way, eliminate them.
Corrigan copied and rewrote one of my Things on page 52. Now his cards use my color scheme.
Action: Gain a Crate token.
Your maximum hand size is increased by the number of Crate tokens you control.
Stack 'em up.
At the end of your turn, if you didn't play a Thing, draw a card.
Red Shirt enters play attatched to a Thing.
Equipped Thing is red.
If a Thing would be destroyed, destroy Red Shirt and the equipped Thing instead.
Sleep With The Fishes
Target Thing's location becomes the bottom of the discard pile.
Action: Destroy Concentrated Sphinx. Until your next turn, whenever an opponent draws a card, you may draw a card.
"Whoo, this is some strong stuff. What's in it?" -Tezzeret, to Jin-Gitaxias
Don't Cross The Borderline
Every players things can't affect their opponents things.
Put a counter on this card for every card you draw from now on. When there are 4 counter on this card, destroy it.
Boon of Swords and Hammers
Destroy a Thing and gain a token of any type
OR return a non-token thing to its owner's hand and play a Thing
OR each opponent discards a card and you put one of the discarded cards in your hand.
At the start of your turn, look at a random card from target opponent's hand.
When Rasputin Impersonator is destroyed for the first time in a turn, he returns to play.
He took over after the original was murdered under mysterious circumstances.
When this enters play choose 2 players. The chosen players each sacrifice 4 things and discard 5 cards. The other players draw 9 cards.
It could be worse. Imagine if this were card #9999!
You Are a Pirate!
You may determine the value of x on any card at all times.
Yarr-harr, fidelidy! Do what you want 'cause a pirate is free!
Lemon Verbena Tea
You can't sacrifice this until it stayed in game for 6 rounds.
Sacrifice this to draw up to 5 cards and bring back up to 2 things from the discard pile to your side of the battlefield.
Use the Action:, Thing: or Action and Thing: ability of a Thing in the discard pile.
Morgan Freeman's Big Sneeze
Destroy every inanimate thing your opponents control.
Look at the hands of every player. Use the Action:, Thing: or Action and Thing: ability of a Thing in someones hand.
Complaints by the Dvorak Community
You may play this in your turn as an Action. If you do, choose 1 thing in play and remove it from the game.
You may play this as a Reaction to someone playing any kind of card. Remove that card from the game.
Dedicated to Corrigan and Bucky. ;-)
Action and Thing: Put an Action card from your hand underneath Staying Power.
At the beginning of your turn, you may play a copy of an Action underneath Staying Power instead of drawing a card. This does not use your Action for the turn.
Indestructible. Whenever all other Things you control would be destroyed, choose one of them and destroy all other Things you control instead. Whenever you would discard your whole hand, Choose a card in your hand and discard the other cards instead. Whenever you would be eliminated from the game, put Staying Tough in the discard pile instead.
Staying Out Of Trouble
Action: You can't be the target of Actions until your next turn.
Thing: Things you control can't be the target of Actions until your next turn.
Choose two Things controlled by different players. They cease to be controlled by anyone.
Return three cards from the discard pile to your hand, then discard two cards. (Action cards don't go into the discard pile until after their effects have resolved.)
Superior Kung Fu
Whenever an opponent plays an Action card, you may play an Action card.
Whenever an opponent activates an Action ability, you may activate an Action ability of a Thing you control.
Turn: Copy a random card from the Infinite Dvorak Archive and add it to your hand.
Lots of time and energy went into every card, literally.
The Awkward Card
Any opponent may touch you inappropriately. If none of them do, draw 3 cards.
Target opponent may have you touch them inappropriately. If they do not, that player discards a card.
Dvorak - A fun game for the whole family.
Put a card from yoyur hand or a Thing you control into target opponent's hand or on top of the deck.
Play only if there are at least 5 cards in the discard pile. Target opponent chooses 3 cards in the discard pile; put them in your hand.
Action:If there are at least 5 cards in the discard pile, target opponent chooses one. Put it in your hand.
Move a card from the discard pile to target opponent's hand and destroy one of their Things. That opponent discards a random card.
Destroy all Things. Each player draws a card for each Thing he or she controlled that was destroyed this way.
Choose a number, then skip that many of your next turns. At the beginning of your next turn, draw three cards for each turn you skipped this way.
Whenever you discard a card, each opponent may draw a card.
He sows in other people's fields and reaps the air.
Clone-in-a-Vat(tm) enters play with four Organ Tokens on it.
Whenever you discard a card, if you are below your maximum hand size, you may remove an Organ Token from Clone-in-a-Vat(tm). If you do, draw a card.
When Thoughtcage enters play, look at target opponent's hand and place a card from their hand face-down under Thoughtcage. Return it to that player's hand when Thoughtcage leaves play.
Play all Actions in the discard pile in any order and skip your next turn,
OR Put all Things from the discard pile into play under your control, and at the end of your next turn, put them in the discard pile and skip your next turn.
Play up to x Actions if you have not played an Action for x consecutive turns before this one.
Action: If x players have used one of Shared Passion's abilities, each may draw x cards. Destroy Shared Passion. This ability may not be used on the turn Shared Passion is played. Action (global): Do nothing.
Reveal a card from your hand. Draw until you draw a card by the same creator; keep it and shuffle the rest into the draw pile.
Play onto another Thing.
Equipped Thing's Action abilities can't be activated.
Discard two cards. Each opponent discards three cards.
Donate a Thing you control to an opponent.
Destroy target Thing. Its controller must flip a coin until they get heads and discard a card for every tails flipped.
Skip your next turn. No opponent's Actions may affect you until it is your turn again.
Sword of Thought and Deed
When this enters play, attatch an Action card and a Thing card from your hand to it or put it in the discard pile.
Action and Thing: If the attached Thing has an Action ability, this ability has an identical effect followed by the effect of the attached Action card.
At any time during your turn, you may destroy this card to either destroy target Thing, OR draw two cards, OR gain three Tokens of the type of your choice, OR choose all options of another Action or ability you are playing instead of the listed number of options.
This should be a "boon" to combo decks.
Reveal your hand and choose a creator. Put all cards in your hand by that creator and all Things you control by that creator into the discard pile, then draw three cards for each.
"Go on without me, I can hold them off and buy you some card advantage. If I'm not back in three turns, don't wait for me." --ChippyYYZ, last transmission
Discard your hand and draw five cards.
Take an Action card that was played during an opponent's last turn from the discard pile and put it into your hand.
Discard down to two cards, then draw five cards and play up to three of them.
Draw until you have 5 or more cards in your hand.
Create a copy of target card in the discard pile and add it to your hand.
Return target Thing to its controller's hand. That player puts a card from their hand on top of the deck.
Once during each of your turns, you may draw a card and discard it immediately.
Cards in the discard pile may not leave the discard pile.
Action: Look at the top card of the draw pile and shuffle it into the top five cards of the draw pile.
As an additional cost to play Heartless Oppression, discard two cards.
Choose one -- Destroy all Things controlled by the player who controls the fewest; or the player with the fewest cards in hand discards his or her hand.
When Exorbitant Tax enters play, destroy three Things you control.
Whenever an opponent draws a card, that player sacrifices a Thing.
Whenever an opponent would draw a card, that player may choose not to. If that player does, you draw a card.
Igor, Gravedigger Novice
Action: Put a Thing card at random from the discard pile into the your hand. Then discard a card at random.
"They let just about anybody carry a shovel these days!"
Nectar of Life
Action - Dream
Draw a card. You can return any card that was destroyed after your last turn ended from the discard pile to your hand.
From the Mirage deck
Destroy a Thing, or discard this card at any time and destroy one of your Things to negate the effects of an Action being played.
Adapted from the Roman Politics deck
I Am Personified Pyramid
...but with only a 1-corner perspective during a 4-corner rotation. Draw four cards, and discard three of them.
From the Time Cube deck
Win the game instantly.
HAHA I WAS KIDDING YOU LOSE THE GAME RIGHT NOW.
Card by Your Face
Take the entire discard pile and draw pile for yourself.
YOU KNOW WHAT? JUST TAKE EVERY SINGLE CARD FROM EVERYONE AND WIN YOUR FACE IN MUD.
Card by YOUR FACE!
Target opponent may not play Actions during their next turn.
What Just Happened?
Every opponent is so stunned at the recent turn of events that during their next turn, they may only draw once and discard if necessary, playing nothing.
At the beginning of your turn, look at target opponent's hand. You may reveal a Thing card from their hand. If you do, until your next turn, Queen Dopplepopolis becomes a copy of that Thing and can't be targeted by that player's Actions.
Discard your hand, put all Things you control in the discard pile, and skip your next turn. If you discarded at least four cards and put at least four Things you controlled into the discard pile, eliminate target player.
You'll lose more than just your voice from screaming this loud.
Choose two Actions in the discard pile. An opponent choose one of them. Put that card into your hand and play the other one immediately.
Luck of the Draw
Play this card as soon as you draw it; you may take another Action this turn. Draw three cards. Choose one of them to discard, then discard one of the remaining two at random.